Just a Quickie Then...

A post, that is. What did you think?

Anyway, most probably I won't be having time to come online again for a few days so warm wishes to everyone out there for an absolutely wonderful new year!

Cheers!
Yours Truly.

Where Have All the Movies Gone?

Is it just me or have the movies been more or less shit of late? Once upon a time, well even not so long ago I've been more or less a movie fanatic and not many of them escaped me. But, of late, there have been hardly a movie that I could say a good one let alone awesome. For the past month or so I abandoned watching at least ten movies halfway through, and now I'm so disappointed I haven't even tried watching one for a week. Two weeks, actually.

To be fair, it always took a special one to impress me. Many movies which many thought were awesome, were pretty OK at best in my eye but still there were a lot of stuff that I liked. I know awesome stuff don't come along everyday, but there always were quite good ones right? Good enough to keep me watching them till the end. But, say, for the last six months Inglorious Basterds, Up and The Taking of Pelham 123 were the only movies I saw that I could say were really good. Inglorious Basterds was awesome, must be said. I still didn't see 2012, but from what I hear there's nothing in it other than everything on earth getting destroyed. Even the latest Harry Potter movie was, at best, ordinary.

Even supposed to be humorous ones were so dry that you could only laugh at the unlaughableness of them. Is there such a word by the way? Back on topic, that latest American Pie movie (what's it's name?) was so boring that I got so pissed I just deleted it for good. Not just delete; shift + delete so I will never see it again. And, what else were there? Oh that animation; 9. What the fuck was that about? I fell asleep at least three times before I got to the end. Surrogates too made me fall asleep, though been damn tired plus the effect of two beers must have had a say in it as well. Not the movie, my falling asleep that is. Then there were a shitload of others I can't even remember except for the fact that they were, err... shit.

Seriously, where the hell are all the good movies gone? Can anyone suggest me a good one to watch. I'll write a blog post in honour of the person who suggest the best one that I have not watched yet. I promise.

P.S.
I'm in Kottu Mag this week. Here. Cool.

Penultimates

Today is the penultimate working day of the year. I always wanted to use the word 'penultimate' in a blog post. How cool is it that I managed it on the penaltimate working day of the year in probably the penultimate post of the year. Yaaaaaaaaahooooooooooooooo! That cheer is for this being the penultimate working day of the year, not for this post being such. Now guess I overused the word in just a single para, let alone a post.

Anyway, as I was saying there is one more working day to go and that too is mainly allowed for cleaning and stuff. We basically clean up each of us' working space, get rid of old and unwanted documents and stuff; basically make the working place a bit cleaner and fresh for next year's work. Is there any such thing going on in Sri Lanka? I'm not sure, but chances are there isn't. I think this is a good thing though - starting a new year afresh is always a good idea, besides you get to spend the last day of the year without working which could only be a plus. Except perhaps for the workaholics.

But before that I'll have to get through this day first, which is a bitch. The problem with working in Japanese is, it takes about, say, six hours to think of what should be done about a program and then even finish the coding but additional two days to prepare the fucking useless absolutely necessary documents. Add to that the fact that I'm at work on a Saturday, after being at work on Christmas day as well. Oh well, I shall get through this torture somehow.

Have a nice weekend you luckier fellows!

Everything Happens for the Best

Once upon a time there lived a great king who's got a prime minister by his side, a man who was full of wisdom. He, the prime minister, always tried to see the glass half filled - positivity is what fueled him and there was no such word as negativity in his vocabulary. Everything happens for the best he used to say all the time. This sometimes irritated the king, for his supposed-to-be-wise friend would say this all the time, even when nothing whatsoever good could be seen around. Yet the king put up with this for prime ministers advices would be quite impressive more often than not.

One day, the great king wanted to go deer hunting, thus a hunting party was organized to be headed by the king and the prime minister. Not too far into the wild, the king and the prime minister separated from the rest of the party chasing a particularly speedy deer. The king attempted several arrows at the deer of which none were successful. Unfortunately, at this moment the minister's careless handling of the sword accidentally cut king's finger. Already in an angry state for not being able to hunt down the deer they were chasing, this made the king go mad. However, while apologising for his carelessness, the minister uttered his usual words; "I'm sorry your highness, but perhaps this too happened for the best". That was it, for the king. There he could not hunt down the deer, and the stupid minister cut his finger, yet he says it happened for the best. The king fired the minister right then and there, sending him back to which the minister merely said; I shall leave you here then, your highness, but I am alright with it for I know that everything happens for the best.

Afterwards, the king continued hunting on his own now that he was separated from his hunting party as well as his faithful minister. However, alone in the forest the king soon lost his tracks and wandered deep into the jungle where he was captured by a group of cannibals. They dragged him into their village and tied to a pole that was erected right at the centre, after which a large cauldron was placed and heated in front of him. This made the king realized what was about to happen; he was going to be sacrificed to the gods, killed that is, and eaten right then and there. But moments before the cannibals were about to strike the first blow, one noticed king's bleeding finger and the leader was duly informed. A hasty investigation later, it was decided that sacrificing an incomplete gift to the gods might anger them, thus the king was released and made free.

The king could not believe his good fortune, and while he found his way back to the castle he finally realized what his prime minister was saying all these years was perhaps true after all. This made him feel terrible, as he had just fired the man who saved his life, even though he didn't know this at that time. Upon his return to the castle, the king sent his men all over the country to find and bring back the minister to him. He was brought back to the castle, and the king humbly apologized for his mistakes but to his amazement the prime minister said that king need not apologize to him and that everything happens for the best.

But my faithful friend, I did such a great injustice to you by firing you when you in fact saved my life by cutting my finger even though it was unintentional, said the king.

Perhaps that saved your life, your highness, but I am actually glad that you fired and sent me away when I cut your finger

How so?

Well, if you didn't fire me, and was with you when you got caught by them, you would have had a cut in your finger but not me!



There, one of my all time favorite stories to you on Christmas eve. Consider it my Christmas gift to you all.

Merry Christmas Friends!

Campus Stories : How to Survive Being Ala

Basic Definitions:

Ragging : A form of abuse on newcomers in educational (mostly) institutions.

Ala : An antiragger. A person who opposes ragging, thus doesn't get ragged by anyone and does not rag anyone.

Wela : People who get ragged, and return the favor to the newcomers come next year.

Semi-Ala : A member of the Ala group by definition, but not wholeheartedly. Hangs out with the other party as well, and does not take a side in a crisis situation.

Semi-Wela : A member of the Wela group by definition, but not wholeheartedly. Hangs out with the other party as well, and does not take a side in a crisis situation.

Purpose of this post is to provide you a guide to survive, even thrive four years in the university without getting ragged, thus the two groups Semi-Ala and Semi-Wela are not discussed henceforth.


Perspective Definitions:

Definition of Alayo by Welayo
Softies. Posh, possesses a good command in English, and usually rich. Looks down on people of all classes that are not theirs, does not care for the commoners. Focused, at all times, only on their well being. Un-patriotic, admires all things foreign and most probably UNP-ish. Spoilt brats/bitches. Hence the term Ala which literally means Potatoes - foreign, expensive, soft and usually perceived as a high class food.

Definition of Welayo by Welayo
The real deal. Tough guys, brave but still possesses a kind heart that cares for humanity. Open minded, wise and are matured. THE prototype of the university student.

Definition of Welayo by Alayo
Assholes. Uncivilized morons, who like nothing better than to see their own suffer. Oppose all things conventional just for the sake of it, and big heads who see their way the only way. Backbone-less for not being able to stand up to other assholes who want you to lick toilets. Being 'radical' and patriotic is considered fashionable. Usually JVP. The term Wela (literal meaning ; over riped Jack Fruit) reflects on the said backbone-less characteristic, basically everything that is the opposite of Potatoes.

Definition of Alayo by Alayo
Humble and brave. All are equal, and nobody's made to do anything by anyone else because they happened to be born a year earlier. Appreciates freedom and the right to live with dignity. Everything that is NOT the definition of Alayo by Welayo.


Tips for survival (tested and proven)
Upon your entering the university, senior Welayo will be uncharacteristically nice to you. Don't be deceived. Repeat, don't be deceived. The niceties are only until you are converted - afterwards you will be asked to clean their toilets with your tongue because the university is on a cost cutting mission and toilet cleaning equipment are not provided to them. Remain uninterested to their invitations at all times, and avoid confrontations as much as possible. Not being alone whenever you are out in the open will be a good practice. Guys will have the added advantage of keeping girls of your batch in company whenever necessary, and girls will have the opportunity of being protected from the evil Welayo, by the Alayo who want to get into your pants. Well not always, but you get the gist.

Know your facts. Some of the common misconceptions promoted by Welayo are that you will not be able to survive four years in the university without the help of the seniors and only Welayo will be given the said help. Or that you will be isolated in lectures. That you will not be able to stay in hostels. Truth is, there are Ala seniors who are more than capable of giving you assistance - a.k.a. Kuppi - and it is very rarely that you have only a solitary Alaya registered in a particular course. You will have at least one partner, usually a lot more. There are hostels that Alayo can stay perfectly well as well. Also, if you're a guy, knowing that usually the girls outnumber guys roughly 1 : 3 when it comes to Alayo will help you keep motivated.

Also being aware of the freedom you will enjoy being Ala is bound to motivate you. For one, you do not have to abide a set of self imposed silly rules that serves no purpose other than to harass you. You don't have to be belt-less and wrist-watch-less for three months. If you're of the fairer sex, you can wear jeans and short skirts if you prefer, without being labelled as a whore. You can use facilities such as the gym and the pool right away as opposed to Welayo who forbid you from the use of them until they deem it appropriate. You don't have to call silly names for the schools which you practically grew up, whenever you are talking about them. You can pretty much live without your human rights being violated if you become Ala.

In the event of a confrontation, assault verbally as much as possible as opposed to being physical. Welayo largely outnumber you, usually at a ratio somewhere around 1 to 20, so a physical confrontation hints at a prospective disaster. Also, do not show any signs of fear even when confronted with a bunch that fits the above proportion - they do not want to start a fight and suffer the consequences, so take advantage of it. Talk, displaying that you're oozing with confidence that you can take them on. Also, they do not have the courage to take you on unless they outnumber you 20 to 1 as mentioned above. Mentioning the names of few 'aiyas' in town you happen to know will probably help, though making sure the said 'aiyas' are not better pals of the Welayo you're confronting would be healthy.

Be politically correct. Though you never really have any intentions of wiping out the Wela population in the university, they want to wipe you out. Thus they will, at times, take drastic measures which might provide you with an opportunity. Always be on alert, and make the best of it when an opportunity comes your way.

Not all Welayo will be as hardcore as their top notch leaders. There are plenty who are not real assholes. Take advantage of it; make friends with them and then induce fear into not so hardcore Welayo by continuously reminding them the might-be-dire consequences of getting into a confrontation with Alayo. Do not forget to remind them that the staff members are more often than not on the lookout for an opportunity to get back at Welayo for their unacceptable behavior in the past.

When you advance through the years, you will inevitably make friends with them. Still, make it a point to remind them the treatments they got from their seniors, and the stupidity of it all. By that time, they have probably realized that anyway, but still reminding that is a good idea because they will be less and less intent on continuing the tradition. Long shot, and takes time, but always worth a try.

Keep reminding yourself, in difficult times, that you were able to hold your head high and that you never bowed to the pressure from them. Be proud of the fact that you did not let anybody abuse you (all pun intended), and that in turn you did not abuse anybody either. That you lived by your principles, and that you did not make it a point to harass someone because they happen to be born after you. Be proud that you were not a disgrace to the humanity.


ONE thing to keep in mind at all times.
The privileges and freedom you enjoy being Ala right from the moment you enter the university did not come without a price. A lot of Alayo before you had to go through a LOT to get what you have today, they had to fight - figuratively and literally - over many years and had to go through a lot. Therefore do not, I repeat, DO NOT, take your freedom and privileges for granted for doing so will only ruin it for many a Ala generation to come. Instead, make sure that they too will be able to enjoy those in years to come.

Good luck to all you potential Alayo!

Inside a box, rolling down a slope

I'm on leave today, but I promise it has nothing to do with the aches all over my body that I have as a result of skiing trying to skiing. Yesterday was the first time I tried my hands, or arms and legs to be more accurate on that bastard of a sport skiing. After more than a three hours of torture, now I feel like I was put inside a box and rolled down a slope - a steep one at that.

Here's how it started. I was to leave my apartment at about 5 in the morning and meet my friends at 5.45, but me being me I woke up only a couple of minutes before 5.45, that too thanks to a wake-up call from a friend. Anyway, after a quick shower and stuff I just made it in time for the bus that leaves for the skiing place, and I thought how lucky I was to make it in time. But a few hours later I was cursing myself for dragging my ass in time - why oh why didn't I get late was a prominent thought in my head. Before skiing session, our friends who were more apt at the sport had advised that after a while you'll feel like that you will never be able to ski in your life, but I wasn't giving much attention to that. I should have though, because that's exactly how I felt after a hour or so.

When you fall down (note "when", not "if"), getting up by yourself is an art of it's own. Well it's a bitch actually. Then after several pathetic attempts just when you manage to get up, inevitably you fall down. At least I did. Again and again and again. The most embarrassing part is when probably eight year old kids ski past you like dolphins in the water while you're trying to get up so pathetically. Anyway, after a couple of hours of this, and cursing myself, I just managed to ski one round without falling, only for a Jap chick to collide with me in the next one and fall down again. But knowing that there are at least some Japs who suck at this just as you is a relief.

Finally, probably in the last half an hour or so, I think I got the hang of it - not much but it was definitely an improvement. I was still in the beginner's track, but hell, that's enough for one day I guess. Despite every joint and muscle aching like hell, I think I will go again.

Happy Monday all!

Dear God...

Since it's that time of the year where we get to ask for what we want, and that you send them with that fat bloke who wears the same thing every year, I thought I might as well put in my wish list. First things first, please buy that dude a new suit or something - red and white is a bit, I don't know, overused perhaps, I guess. Just give him somethings else, make it blue and gold with a baseball cap (oh it's snowing, OK let him keep the snow cap then) and he'd look good. What does he wear rest of the year anyway? And give him some fancy sorta car or something. Come on, this is the digital age and all, don't make him ride that cart thing.

OK I think, scratch that, I was a good boy past year. See, I quit smoking, I've helped people, was less of an asshole compared to what I was before, had less fights with people, stopped whining - online or otherwise - and started being nice to people as much as I can. You've got to agree that's a lot. Specially coming from me. So I can send you the list right? OK here goes:

• I know this sounds stupid, but can you please make the winter, umm.... warm? I mean, I hate this cold weather. And that makes electricity and gas bills rocket sky high.

• Speaking of which, I wouldn't mind an increment either. Of salary I mean, not the bills.

• And please make my boss think that we deserve extra 10 paid leaves a year. 10 is not much right?

• Make all the Japs speak English.

• Visas are a bitch. Get rid of them. Make it so that we can go anywhere without them. OK I know some people, many islanders included, have a tendency to not return, but still. I promise I will.

• Make Sri Lankan food available here. Believe it or not, it's been a year since I had string hoppers. Or egg hoppers. Or pittu. Kadey Paan. EGB. Sri Lankan Chinese Rise, kottu, egg rotti, rotti. You get the point right?

• I love coffee. Let me have loads. Preferably Starbucks.

There's a lot more, but this'll do for the time being. See, I don't even like to ask you much, so I guess you'll let me have my couple of wants, won't you? Being such a nice and humble fellow I'm sure you're not gonna say no to my small request. Right?

Thank you so much.
Yours,
Sach - The Good Boy.

P.S.
While you're at it, if this is not too much to ask, can you also make earth flat? I've come to really hate this sphere-shaped one.
Thank you again.

The Dreaded Friend

Let's call him R. We're like digital friends or something - it's either 1 or 0. When we do get in touch, however far and apart those occasions are, we are great buddies and when we are not in touch, we really lose all the connections. Haven't seen or even heard from the bugger for quite a while now, which I can't decide whether a good thing or a bad thing. Because, despite being such a cool dude and a good friend, he always brings disaster to my life whenever we meet. It's not intentional, but things get weird and more often than not I end up wanting to kill him more or less.

We first met when I was in my O/L classes. I attended a Science tuition class of which I was the only guy among six girls. That was cool - those were the days when you are positive about having a chance with every chick you come across - and having six of them to choose from was considered cool. More time was spent on trying to impress them instead of learning anything, but looking back, making a fool of myself is how I could best describe what I was doing. However the girls were nice enough not to break the harsh truth to me, thus I was basking myself in this assumed glory for a couple of months. Then R joined the tuition class, the bugger entered into my life, and there ended my glory days in the class.

R always dressed carelessly. His usual attire was a rugged denim and a T shirt with Bata slippers. Add a baseball cap and he was all set. Unfortunately that was a time when I was insistent on dressing well, and we couldn't have been more contrasting at the class. Soon it became a competition as to who would impress the girls most, and I tell you these girls like carelessly dressed jerks (yes he was a jerk back then) over well dressed nice guys. My nice guy tactics were of no use and R was winning the battle hands down. Pretty soon he wanted to go for the hottest of the six. Let's call her M. Unfortunately, as much as R was a jerk M was a bitch. Up until then I was giving attention to all of them - no discrimination was my policy - but R changed all that and M started acting like a, well, girl I suppose. And things got really messed up, girls started hating M, R started acting like a jerk even more, and M was having fun and making R look bad insulting him all the time with snide remarks, and I was left to watch all this. Then one day M announced in front of the whole class to R that don't be an asshole and stop chasing her, that she's too good for him, for poor (literally) old R. What she didn't know was R is filthy rich. The next day the bugger drove his dad's Mercedes to the class, M was stunned and made to shut up. Then - this is really sad to say - not many days passed by and M completely changed her attitude and started acting like a kitten in front of him. But R was full of ego too, he gave a good earful to M, M retorted, girls took her side in the end and I took his, all hell broke loose and thus ended my happy days with the six chicks.

Oh well, said I and we moved on, R and I remained friends. Bros before whores and all. After the O/Ls he left to Aussie and sent me a message telling he's got a pet donkey at his place there. I often wondered why a donkey would have another as a pet, but never got to find out as that was the last time I heard from him for a long long time. Several years passed by and one day I got a call from R saying he was in Sri Lanka and lets meet. Meet we did, and sure enough it too was more or less an embarrassing episode. That was the time when I was with my ex . Let's call her N. We used to meet at MC a lot, food court being one of our favorite joints. That day I was to meet with her so I thought why not ask her to come too. I asked both R and N to come there at about 4 in the evening but I got late. Big mistake. When I got there, R was sitting dumbstruck in our favorite table and N was storming away from it. Apparently the bugger had thrown a pickup line or two (I'm sure it must have been pretty lame) at N and she happened to be in a particularly pissed off mood as well. A lot of explaining, apologies and hissyfits later we settled it all, but you get the picture what kind of a friend he is.

Then another couple of years later suddenly R appeared in my doorstep one evening saying he came back to Sri Lanka for a short visit and that he's leaving the next day! However, while cursing him, I jumped in the car and we drove to pick up a friend before ending up in another's place for the evening. With three bottles of Black Label, unfortunately. By midnight the four of us had finished two of the three bottles and were quite high, and I suggested that we call it a day. That was the time I was in the second year of the university and I had a 8 a.m. lecture the next morning. The other two agreed but R was having none of it, and the bugger played the trump card saying Adoh, I came back to see you after many years and leaving tomorrow, you guys can't stay with me for a few more hours? Now that's like your wife saying honey let's go for a dinner when you have a world cup semi final to watch, if you know what I mean. In the end, we had to stay like close to 3 in the morning, the last bottle was finished and we were piss drunk. I don't remember how he drove in that state but he dropped me at home and I hit the bed straightaway. Not wanting to miss the lecture (yes, there was a time that I did attend lectures, you know) I got up the next morning, or the same morning to be precise, and was at the lecture. Just in time. Now, in lectures usually we take the back row but that day - of all days - the bloody lecturer felt like inviting us to the front row and I had to sit in the front row. With a hangover. I have never wished more I didn't drink. Or I didn't know R.

Since then it's been close to five years, and it's about time he made his next reappearance. As much as I miss the bugger, I'm just helplessly awaiting the dreaded day and what it would bring me this time...

Unit of Love

What's the unit of love? If you've never given a thought to this, this would be a good time to rake your brains, ask the pundits or search the net to find a satisfactory answer. One good (perhaps) method would be to consider how it is expressed, not by actions but by words. Then it is apparent that the unit of love varies drastically, not to mention hilariously, from person to person on their choices of words. Often this is confusing, though, as usually any line of expressing love doesn't usually state the unit leaving us to deduce what it might be.

For example, consider a standard and well used line like Sweetheart, I love you more than the whole wide world. Now, one could argue that the unit of love is cubic meters (let's stick to SI) as the statement refers to the world, which indicates a volume. However others might try to differ stating that though the sentence refers to the world, it does not necessarily refers the size as in volume. They might argue that the word wide gives an indication to the fact that it could in fact be length (breadth also being a length) and that the unit should be meters. Then again, others might also say that it could be the weight though no direct indications are given in this case.

However, certain expressions leave us with no clue at all as they state the amount of affection in relation to the amount of affection you have for another person/animal/thing etc. On a different note, it would be healthier for the one who express their love in this fashion to think twice on to whom or what they compare their love. One wrong word, and you could be doomed. Specially men. Hell hath no fury like a woman cheated, someone once said. Getting back on topic, an expression like I love you million times more than the love I have for everyone and everything in the whole wide world leaves us with no clue at all to finding the unit of love. But the lack of indication doesn't necessarily imply that there isn't in fact a unit, so we shall move on.

Sweetheart, my love for you is equal to the length of the universe times it's breadth in nanometers! Surely an educated idiot who lost it. Naturally, it tend to confuse things. At face value you could say the unit of love is nanometers squared, thought it might suggest otherwise if you take a closer look. It could very well be that what's intended there is the number representing the value of the area of universe in nanometers as it tends to be much larger compared to the same value represented in square meters. Thus this statement cleverly disguises the unit of value misleading us into think that it's nanometers. Perhaps not an idiot after all, but we shall not be fooled.

Moving on, an expression like My love for you is more than the weight of all the cow dung that's ever put on this earth, though gross and should not be associated with a wonderful feeling like love in the first place, gives us a clear indication helping our cause. Similarly, Length of all the Harry Potter books ever printed put in one line, surely by a big Harry Potter fan who professed his or her undying love to their grade five classmate, says that the unit is meters. By the way, I did not make up the above two - they were in fact real - I promise. There are some people like that.

This could go on. Love inspires all things human, and since there's no shortage of either - love and humans that is - there surely won't be a shortage of expressions to be analyzed either. Thus we shall stop there, and perhaps indulge in it and add another one or two to the ever growing How-much-I-love-you list of quotes.

Like, Sweetheart, I love you so much that I'd get a sex change done if you turn lesbian.

I'm back with the letter to that sixteen year old jerk!

Hello people!

So... how have you been? Good? Good. I'm good too. I've never seen three 'good's in as many consecutive sentences. Make it four. Alright, first things first. Our good old LadyD tagged me with that letter-to-sixteen-year-old-self thing which The Drummer started. Guess I owe them that, so here goes:


Dear Sach
First, shut up and listen. I know you've already got a bucket load of questions, but read till the end. Then you can ask. I'm you, only went around the sun further 12 times. And I'm supposed to write you a letter, advising you if I feel like it, I'm even allowed to tell you what's gonna happen to you fool in the coming years. Ha, imagine that! I know a shitload of things about your future, what you did or what you didn't, for that matter. So, you wanna know? But that's the problem. Me being you, I know that I didn't get a letter from an older me when I was sixteen. What happened (or what's gonna happen, is it?) really? Either this didn't get delivered to you, or I didn't write it knowing that I'm not gonna get it because I didn't get it. That's confusing right? But, if I throw this away, that'll be the obvious reason why I didn't get it. So, instead, I'm gonna go on and write this and see how you didn't get it.

Ha, now you feeling good don't you? So ready to listen to what you're gonna do? What, you really thought I'm gonna tell you? Good luck with that son, you're not gonna hear a thing! Why would I tell you anything? You'll have to figure out by yourself what to do with your life. I made my decisions, ended up here, and I like being me so I wouldn't wanna change it.

Instead, how about me telling you a few things that's gonna happen in near future that does NOT concern you? Well, let's say they are very less likely to affect you. I know that there are so many things you're wondering about right now, how they are gonna end up and all that. I can tell you a few, but please don't go boasting to everyone that you know the future. Keep them to yourself for god's sake, OK?

• The world didn't end in, oh well, in any of the years many a lunatic predicted.
• You're still alive too, but you deduced that already.
• At 40, Sanath Jayasuriya is still playing cricket, so are Sachin and Murali, but not Warne. And no, Sri Lanka didn't win another World Cup.
• Neither did All Blacks. I know I know it's unbelievable, but what to do man?
• Flying cars are still in the future, sorry.
• So is immortality. Sorry again.
• Nobody made a dinosaur. Yet.
• Aliens aren't here yet either. Perhaps they're still on the way. Or maybe Einstein is right after all.
• No further moon landings and Mars or Venus is a distant dream. Lot of 'no's eh? So much for your enthusiasm.
• A Sri Lankan will win an Olympic medal. I promise I'm not lying.
• Politics? Forget that. It'll be the same.
• There will be 4GB RAMs and 1TB hard disks. I know you don't have the slightest idea what those are, but I also know you're going to try and find out tomorrow. When you do, you'll be surprised but don't tell anyone or you'll look like a fool.
• Almost everyone will have a mobile phone, and those will fit in your shirt pocket even. Quite easily.
• Computers too will be pretty common.
• Time travelling, not yet. Oh wait, so THAT'S why I didn't get this letter!

Ha, that old drummer. He almost fooled us into thinking that these letters will get delivered actually! Lucky I didn't write all the stupid shit you're gonna do or else the whole blogsphere would get to know what a dimwit I was. Whew!

Alright then, see you in twelve years sonny.

You.
Me.
Whatever.


I'm supposed to tag two people, but guess that almost every one's tagged by now. Besides, even the drummer has let go of this thing, so why would I try otherwise? Anyway, if you're not tagged yet, take this as a tag for you and go ahead.

So... did you miss me? Or did you go like No shit, the loser's back! when you saw the title? In that case, well, sorry. If it was the first, thank you, I love you and I missed you too. Anyway, this is totally random and out of topic, but I saw a damn funny FB group the other day. I usually meh most of them, but this is just friggin' hilarious. The name of the group is The hilarity of Harry Potter quotes when changing "wand" to "willy". You get what it is, and here are few of the pure gold stuff.

"Harry held Ron's willy as his own was defective."

"Harry rubbed his willy feverishly until white sparks shot out of the end, which earned him a disapproving look from Fleur."

"Don’t put your willy there, boy! roared Moody."

"Ron struggled for a moment before managing to extract his willy from his trousers. “It’s no wonder I can’t get it out, Hermione, you packed my old jeans, they’re tight!” “Oh, I’m so sorry,” hissed Hermione, and Harry heard her mutter a suggestion as to where Ron could stick his willy instead."

And my personal favorite;

"Panting, Harry fell forwards over the hydrangea bush, straightened up and stared around. There were several faces peering through various nearby windows. Harry stuffed his willy hastily back into his jeans and tried to look innocent."

Priceless, aren't they? There are some creative buggers out there I tell you. Well other than that, the break has been good. Had a lot of sleep, played some cricket - oh by the way I think I told you that we entered a final right? But unfortunately it had to be postponed to next March as weather is too cold to be playing cricket these days. It's the end of the Autumn, and last weekend I went to see one of the last places in Japan you can still see some brilliant Autumn leaves. Captured a few on my camera, so you can check them out here.

Later fellas!

Going Underground

Not underground underground though I do go underground occasionally when I travel by subway trains, but I assure you those trains have got nothing to do with the Subway fast food restaurant chain.

Anyway. I need a break.

So, will be off for a while but I do hope to come back ASAP. Will be reading you guys' posts though. You can't really miss the Lankanosphere can you?

OK then, happy blogging fellas!
Later...

Finally a Final

You know how semi finals have been a bitch for us lately, right? See there, how conveniently I assumed that you're a regular reader here and that you are familiar with every little detail of my life. Of course the chances are you don't, or even you don't care. In case you don't know but do care, well, I've been playing cricket here in Japan, and after two unsuccessful attempts this time we got through to a final! Yey! The match was far easier than we thought, with the opponents (Indians, this time) being bundled out for a below par 70. Being true to our national team's performance of late, we almost fucked up chasing it but managed to reach the target with a couple of wickets to spare. Now, in couple of week's time we'll play the final, and gee don't we wanna win it.

Talking about cricket and Indians, didn't Sachin play one hell of an innings the other day? Man he almost pulled it, but lost the wicket at the most crucial time. Yet it was a true masterpiece, what an innings it was. The dude's been around for like forever and he's still 36! It's gonna be a long time before somebody break all his records.

Autumn is almost about to finish, or has it already? Anyway, too bad couldn't go see any Autumn Leaves this time around which is one of the most beautiful things you'd see here in Japan. I so love the wonderful colors, the feeling and everything. If you're in Paradise Island there are so many things you have that you can make us poor fellas envy you, but this is one where we get to score a point. Ain't that cool?

Anyway, fellas, what's been going on in the Lankanosphere of late? Couldn't even get to read many - this is a time where I could use one of those Lately in the Lankanosphere posts by the Drummer. Wait, has he done one already? Let me check...

Do you want to see your future? Do you really?

Have you ever wished that you could see into your future? Just get a glimpse of it. Just to know what you are, where you will be in few years time? I'm pretty sure most of you have, at least once or twice in your life and I bet you thought that it could only be a cool thing if you could. But have you ever stopped to consider how fucked up things could get if it were the case, instead of all things being nice?

Well, here's your chance.

On October 6th, 2009 every human in the world lost consciousness for 2 minutes and 17 seconds, and withing that time they had a glimpse of their own future. Who they will be, where they will be, on the 29th of April 2010 to be exact. But within those 2 minutes and 17 seconds millions of people died from all sorts of accidents; over 800 planes crashed in USA alone, thousands of car accidents, fires - everything imaginable. But that wasn't really the worst part even. Those 137 seconds of their future people saw changed everything. If you thought you would be less concerned about the future if you could see it, you can't be anymore wrong. Instead of being less concerned, people started living for the future they saw. One man who had been sober for seven years see him being piss drunk His wife sees herself having feelings for someone she has never met in her life. Another man who's daughter has been dead for so many years sees her alive. And worst of all, some people saw absolutely nothing, which could only mean one thing...

Now, do you really want to see your future again?

The happiest person on earth...

...will have nothing to change if given a chance to go back in time and change anything they wish in their lives.

The Bug that Follows Me

Not a real one though - if it were I could have easily used some bug sprayer and get rid of him already. This is a virtual bug, one of the more irritating breed. Doesn't make sense, I know, how can a problem involving computers follow you, you might ask. See the importance of punctuation by the way; those two yous would have looked a bit stupid otherwise. Anyway. Have you come across this Windows bug where folders always open in their own windows even when the folder option setting is specified so that they should open in same window? That is perhaps the most annoying but there ever is, don't you think so? So, as I was saying this bug seems to follow me - or rather it comes up in every computer I seems to touch at work. Funnily, and luckily I might add, it didn't come up in my home laptop though. Not yet at least.

Now, this occurred first some months ago while at work. I was using a PC back then, and this came up out of nowhere. I was going to reformat my computer anyway, and did, but the damn thing came up even after that. Several hours of net-searching later, I could fix it. Then a couple of months later I switched to a laptop. Sure enough, the bug came up after a while, and again got rid of it somehow. Funny thing is, one fix that you could use in one machine doesn't work in another. Anyway, then last week I again switched my laptop to another, which has been in use for several months without any trouble at all. I set my hand on it, not two days pass by, lo' and behold, THE DAMN BUG COMES UP AGAIN!

In case there are other souls who has the same problem, thought I might share what I did. Actually there are a few, and you might try each and every one of them until you get it fixed or your brain need fixing. Usually this occurs on Vista, though XP and even Windows 98 are known to have it. If you are using Vista, chances are that you're having IE 8 in your system. First try removing it and switch back to IE 7. This might fix it. Also keep in mind that if/when you download windows updates it will download IE 8 upgrade as well. So make sure you uncheck it before you installing updates - you never really use IE in the first place, do you?

For the other methods you need to tweak the registry a bit. You could try either of the two following, first of which solved it for me but the second one too is known to solve the issue sometimes.

Solution 1

1. Open up the registry and go to HKEY_USERS\S-1-5-21-xxxxxxxx-xxxxxxxx-xxxxxxxx-1005\Software\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion.
   Here, xxx... refers to some numbers which differs from computer to computer. But it should always begin with HKEY_USERS\S-1-5-21 and end with 1005. Sometimes this 1005 too can be changed to something like 1000 in your computer but worry not it's all the same.
   
   
2. Then, within it is an entry called "Explorer". You need to delete it, but just to be safe rename it to something like Explorer2 so if you mess up everything then you can always go back and change it back to what it was.
   
   
3. Reboot.
   

This should normally do it, though on some machines it doesn't work.


Solution 2

1. Go to registry entry HKEY_CLASSES_ROOT\Folder\shell\open\command
   
   
2. Change it's default value to %SystemRoot%\Explorer.exe /separate,/e,/idlist,%I,%L
   Again, backing up the original value would be a good idea in case you mess up everything.

If any of that doesn't work, you could look up on the Internet a bit more and you might come up with some other solution. Even if that doesn't work, you should probably find a good 2x2 pollak and smack a couple of blows to the computer and find a job that doesn't involve computers.

Happy debugging guys!

Nobody speaks for our human rights!

Saturday. At work. Tragic, I know. Shouldn't this be considered some kind of human rights violation, being made to work on Saturdays? That Amnesty International and all the other organizations so big on human rights and stuff need to do something about this. Surely they can't ignore such a cruel and inhuman act being carried out in public like this. Where are they when they are needed the most? Just imagine if they took the necessary steps and suddenly the cops break into our office and let us poor victims go freely! Dreaming, I know, but still that's a very pleasing thought. And just in case my boss or any other relevant party reading this, it was meant to be a joke. Of course I love to work, boss; there's nothing that can feel better than working hard for the betterment of my own as well as company's future. There, I covered my bases.

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Tomorrow there's going to be another cricket match - a semi final in the T20 league we're playing in and hope we'll get through. Then we can think of winning the titled and how we would be glorified and stuff. Oh, no, I shouldn't talk like that, it's not politically correct. This, rather, is how I'm supposed to talk you know. Anyway, wish us luck people - we might need it. Thanks in advance.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's lucky that I was always a bit of an ambidextrous. Probably because my mom's a total leftie (not leftie leftie though) and father's a right-handed. Still the hand that I can use better among the two is my right hand, but I write with my left hand and I bat left-handed. And I can use my left had better than a normal right hander would for tasks such as using tools, holding something, ride left handed on a foot bike and pretty much everything else. Also, though I write and draw with my left hand, I can use the right for both the tasks a bit well - of course it's slow, but better than a normal person I'm pretty sure. However, it's lucky because right now here at work I'm using three monitors and two computers with two mouses. Going off topic for a moment, but which is the correct term when it comes to the computer mouse - two mouses or two mice? If you can say Windows is shutting down, surely you can say two mouses can't you? No? Whatever. Anyway, yeah, luckily I could use both the hands so using a mouse with the left hand's a no problem really.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

OK then fellas, I'm off. Enjoy your weekends while I'm stuck here with work. And I typed that whole sentence with my left hand.

13 Million Dollars to Kill a Man?

Today I came across this very interesting article which claims that in America the death penalty costs on average $10 million more per yer per state than life sentences. That is $500 million more per year if you consider the all 50 states. There have been 37 executions in USA last year, so that roughly accounts to 13.5 millions per execution per year.

WTF!!! was my first, second and third reaction. Way too much money to kill a few bastards, by any standard. Seriously, America needs to get its act together - indeed it's their money, but if you read that article you'll see that many people in USA itself think that it is ridiculous - because there are a lot of things you could do, lot of good things with that much of money.

Personally, I'm not either for or against the capital punishment as I see pretty strong arguments for both the cases. You could of course argue that no human, even a system, has the right to take the life of another human being irrespective of the crimes they might have committed. Also, if you see the brutality of all the methods that are employed in executing - electric chair, gas chamber or even the lethal injection is no better than stoning to death; killing is killing - that is all the more reason to oppose it. On the other hand, some of the crimes people have committed are entirely unimaginable - not to mention how barbaric - and deserve nothing short of death. If you are willing to kill another human being, if you are so desperate to rape a woman, then you so deserve to die as well. On a bit of a different note, those Amnesty International people who scream their lungs out against it amuses me at times - I often wonder how many of them eat meat. How is it OK to kill an innocent animal just so you could eat it, but not OK to get rid of a shameless bastard that has committed darkest of crimes imaginable? Beats me.

However, if the cost of the process of executing a criminal is that high, surely you have to think twice. You can imprison the criminal for good for far less money and put that money into good use. Besides, sometimes I think that imprisonment could be a far worse punishment than the death penalty, in the longer run, but it has to be proper. Someone who's sentence for life should not be able to come out in 20 years. A life sentence should be a life sentence, not a 20 year vacation. If it's made sure they spend the rest of their lives inside four confined walls with no one to talk, then that would perhaps be the meanest of tortures that there is. Living inside a dark and lone room everyday, knowing that there is no escape for the rest of you life is worse than dying, make no mistake. Serves them right. While that is being done, all that saved money can be used to make lives better for people, in turn eliminating the cause for many a crime - poverty. Educate a few children, hell you can educate a lot more than few children with five hundred million dollars. Give them better jobs, make their lives better and that'll serve better for reducing crime more than any punishment that there is.

That will be money well spent.

My Brain's Gone Crazy

When you have a particularly painful headache the first thought the brains throws at you is something like Dude, what the hell are you still doing at work? let's go hit the bed, but of course that's not an option. At least not when you have only two paid leaves left for the year and you happen to have plans for those two as well. Then the brain starts to get pissed off, probably because it thinks that it is superior than the body that it has chosen to reside in, but the problem is then it starts to throw really weird thoughts and ideas (though I'm not sure what's the difference between thoughts and ideas, it felt like two words instead of one there would fit better) at you just for the fun of it. It'll throw one at you, and just when you get over it, brain'll go like; Oh you liked that biatch, check this out then and will throw even crazier thought at you. It's endless. Perhaps it must be thinking you'd get fed up with all the weird thoughts and choose to go home early or something. Tough luck buddy, try next year when I have more leaves so that I can afford to take one.

However, now that my brain has decided to attack me with these thoughts right now, I've decided not to let it take control over me and let me take home, instead to fight them and stay here till six. And post those thoughts here so at a later stage when my brain decides to look at the blog it'll probably be embarrassed and will refrain from doing such things in the future. Hopefully.

OK. First one. What if we humans were a cold-blooded species, like many reptiles instead of being the warm-blooded creatures we are today. How different the world would be if it was the case? There would have been a lot more subways (not the restaurant chain though I wouldn't mind more Subways over MacDonald's), different sense of fashion altogether, no marathons or cricket - altogether a wholly different world. Add to that the possibility if we were cold-blooded that we might as well be egg-laying creatures. Now that's a thought. Imagine, after so many months of pregnancy the mother lays an egg (DO NOT LAUGH!) and then instead of the mother going to the clinic, the parents will probably bring the eggs. Imagine a long line of parents waiting outside the clinic with their newly-laid eggs. What a mess would it be if they happen to mix up their eggs? And either way, doctors will poke all kinds of medical stuff into those eggs, probably that scanning thing too and parents will be able to see the kid inside and even go like Ohh.... he's so cute!!!. And when the time comes, would we have opt to hatch them at home with all the relatives around, or would we still preferred hospitals? OK now I cannot keep a straight face anymore. That is a messed up world alright.

What if some crazy aliens decided that they should pay us a visit and just for the fun of it polluted our world with some kind of gas or something, so that the only way for us humans in that world to survive is to smoke cigarettes? Imagine that! All of a sudden all the drug preventing associations and such will run out of business, everyone who so opposed smoking will actually start it, even parents will encourage their children to smoke! Scary if not crazy, I know, but it's fun too eh?

Then my brain goes like, OK dude, how about stepping in a woman's shoes? though I seriously doubt I could fit my foot into a woman's shoe unless she's a particularly large creature, but you get the idea right. So, now I'm thinking of an utterly female-dominant society. While they go to work, earn money to feed the family and stuff, we stay at home, feed the kids, do the laundry and clean the house. Please you males out there, don't start to chase me brandishing whatever that's in your hand right now for a) I'm not really in a state to run right now, even for my life and b) It's not really me, my brain that's doing all this so pardon me. Anyway, then men will get all the roses, girls will start to dig men (not that they don't now) and we, men, will be the oppressed and discriminated bunch. Think of a world where men's rights associations rallying on the streets for their freedom, asking women to stop discriminating against men!

No. That's too much of a scary thought. Alright brain you win - I'm going home.

Who Wants To Be Famous?

Sometimes I wonder what is it like to be someone like Sachin Tendulkar, Angelina Jolie, Tiger Woods or Barak Obama. You have all the money in the world and a bit more, well perhaps Obama doesn't, but what the fuck, when practically you're the most powerful man on earth you don't really need money. And then they have the recognition, are loved by many - in Jolie's case it's a scary thought though - and simply put, famous and popular. They can pretty much get what they want.

Except freedom.

In a recent interview, Sachin said that he hadn't walked the streets of India for close to a decade. Poor guy. Imagine, you, not being able to walk the streets of Colombo, not being able to go to Pillawoos and have a Kottu without having to sign forty autographs. Though all of the above said four guys wouldn't mind that, I would, though there is no need for me to be so since nobody really give a shit about me going anywhere. And that's the first ever sentence I wrote with two "though"s in it. However, the point is, being all that comes with a cost and I will never want their lives, not at such a high cost anyway.

I'd like to be Brad Pitt for one night though.

Happy Friday

Fridays are happy day's aren't they? No, I'm not saying that Fridays are happy chaps or anything, just that we are so happy on Fridays, isn't it? Except perhaps if you have to work on Saturday. So here I am happily at work waiting for another four and a bit more hours to pass. As happy as I can be despite having absolutely no idea of how to fix a couple of bugs that I'm supposed to, but who cares anyway? Wish this bug fixing was as easy as that of Barn Buddy though - you just have to spray the bug spray and "blonng", the bug's gone, just like that.

Anyway, talking about bugs, I think this whole software business is a bit funny anyway. How many of you out there like your jobs? I must say I like mine, and judging by blog posts on Lankanosphere and status messages on FB, and the general feeling anyway, I'm pretty sure I'm in a rare breed regarding that. However, that's not to say that there aren't times that I feel like running up the wall, only I can't. Saying anything about you creative lot is a risky business as that old drummer fella once very correctly said, but still I'm going to take that risk being the brave soul I am and all that. You guys complain all the time about clients being assholes, not being ready to listen, and what not. But you can at least talk, hold meetings, explain, plead, cry, threaten or whatever else that you have to and perhaps at least get them to some kind of agreement. Try all that with a computer. If a code is wrong, it is wrong. No amount of explaining, pleading, crying or threats are going to change that. Even if you howl like a baby in front of them, they wouldn't even care. Threatening to smash the CPU and throw the monitor off the window doesn't even make them twitch. Tough bastards, these computers are. Or maybe they just know that we're bluffing - I'm pretty sure however much I am pissed, I'm not going to smash a goddamn PC here and pay for it from my wallet. But despite that, I like my job. The satisfaction you get when you come up with a decent algorithm, or a piece of code that work so seamlessly is immense.

OK then, that's about all what I have to say, and even that wasn't really anything important was it? Maybe that's the best thing about blogging - you can say whatever you want to despite the very likelihood of nobody really listening (reading, to be more accurate) and still be really happy about it. Just like I did right now.

Happy Weekend Folks!

How To Deal With Keyboard Warriors

If you're a blogger, the chances are that you know one or two of them. If you have ever been on an internet forum for long enough, again you should have encountered a couple of them. If you're neither, still it is very likely that you're in FB, and that you know them. The thing with them is they're not trolls, but quite happy (if they could ever be happy that is) to bash everyone around them, have a bitch fit when someone has a different view to that of theirs and quite fond of using the words "fuck off" as an escape route. However, it is important that you know how to deal with them and even have fun with them. Here's how.

Maintain your cool at all times

The whole point of dealing with them is not to get pissed but to make them pissed. You getting angry is like pouring oil to the fire, and chances are that you might end up being one. So, be cool.

Do not get offended

It is very likely you get all kinds of insults thrown at you including racist and sexist remarks. Usually they may question your sexual orientation, or your ability to engage in any such acts, your mother's profession and/or character, the fact that whether the one that's married to your mother is indeed your father, your mental stability and any other such things. They usually question all those, and are quick to label you. But DO NOT get offended for they are just words, probably of someone belongs to one or more categories mentioned above.

Talk sense

They may talk all the nonsense in the world and some more, but you should not. If you do, what's the difference? Always reply with cohesive arguments. Usually these guys talk crap and when they are in trouble just throw insults everywhere and try to get out of the mess that they created. Don't let them.

Find a weak point

They always have one. Usually more, so don't let them slip. The standard prototype of these people are they try to portrait them as radical free-thinkers who can tolerate an argument. They are not, though. Their interpretation of being radical is questioning, no strike that off, bashing any standard or accepted practice/method/way of life just for the sake of it. Without any solid arguments too. They call them free thinkers, but the moment someone has got a different view they jump the gun and start to shower everyone around with all the abuses in the world. So, find a weak point or two in what they have to say and take maximum advantage of it. It's fun to make them pissed off.

Have fun

The more you contradict their views, the more they get pissed off. You should maintain you cool and then throw all kinds of funny/witty comments at them. But no cheap insults. No bashing. For instance, if you are being told that you're a son of a bitch, don't try to say otherwise. Just say yes, and reply with something like Perhaps she is, I wouldn't know, but at least she gave birth to a healthy and sane kid, unlike in your case. Trust me, that kinda line makes them go mad.

Finally, know when to stop

Because of two things. One, after a while neither of you will have anything to say and you'll end up repeating. Which is boring. Two, you don't have to have the last say, just have the best say and get out! Also, they maybe jobless, but are you?

Now that you know what to do, go have some fun guys!

A Picture Speaks a Thousand Words

The next time you complain, stop to think for a second; are things really as bad as you think they are?

I'm NOT at work. HOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

Having to not work on Mondays is bliss. I feel for you folks who are at work right now, still half asleep, grumpy and wishing Mondays should be made illegal or things along the lines. Hooooo! That's a Sinhala "Hooo" by the way, not an English one. OK, so here I am at home, and being so lazy to cook ordered a Pizza for lunch, so now stuffed and feeling drowsy.

On a different note, a note to self : you seriously need to learn to think twice before you speak. You seriously do. You sometimes don't realize how a simple word could hurt your loved ones so much... Stop being an idiot and grow up.

Weekend saw us losing one semi final, and getting through to another. As you might know, our cricket season is coming to an end, and there were couple of games, one Twenty20 and the other a forty overs a side. We scored a below par 115 in the 20 overs game, but some very accurate bowling and fielding saw us defending it to enter the semi finals. It was a great match, very intense and a nail-biting finish. The opponents had to score 11 in the last over with only one wicket in hand, but the bugger hit a boundary in the first ball of it. Next was a dot and 7 from 4 was the equation when perhaps our best player, call him D, got the last wicket.

Then headed to a place on a mountain close by, and it was some forty kilometers away! Driving up for that long on a winding road is, well, not really fun especially after running around all day, but the place was fun. We cooked, OK, the two girls who were there cooked a damn good chicken curry and potatoes which we named "A La Festa" because it was more like an Ala Paste. But it was good, had a couple of beers along with it before hitting the bed.

The next day was not so good though. Again we batted first, and again D batted brilliantly but nobody was there to hang around and support him, so we were bowled out for 163 inside the forty overs. Shame. Then, still we were well on our way to a victory, with them 7 down for a hundred odd runs but then they batted well, hell they batted us out of the game and the competition. Too bad that had we gotten through it would have been our first final. But hell, there's always another year.

The Good Side of Typhoons

What's the one good thing about typhoons? What's that? There aren't any? Trust me, there are. At least there is one - you get to stay at home instead of going to work, though that could only be for a few hours. There was this typhoon that hit Tokyo this morning, a fierce one too, so much so that when I got up this morning all I could hear was the sound of the wind. Whoooooooooooooooooosh! You know... After getting ready and stepping onto the road, I was practically concerned more about not getting blown away by the wind than walking. It was such a whirlwind, things flying everywhere including a couple of trains and an apartment complex. Somehow I managed to make it to the train station, but then got the good bad news that they have put on hold all train services because they were afraid they might run out of trains.

OK that's stretching it a bit too far, but seriously there was a typhoon this morning and that resulted in a hold up of train services. And, in Japan, that means no transportation and you have an excuse for being late for work. So I happily trotted back home with a sandwich and a coffee in hand and spent a few hours in the oh so cozy bed, until about 12 noon, instead of being at work. Now, tell me again, are typhoons that bad?

Yesterday, went to see an exhibition about printing stuff. This. You see, I work at a software company and we do a lot of printer related stuff. The exhibition was awesome, there were some really cool printing, cutting and such machines. These Japs are good at this kind of thing trust me. Oh and there were some machines, running software that I too was involved in making and it felt good to see them there. Operating in real world. By the way, while I was there some guy from a company wanted me to answer a questionnaire, in English, and you've got to make the most of any chance you get to use English in Japan. I answered a few questions, afterwards along with a shower of thanks the dude gave me a card full of stickers that you can stick to your computer, as a present. The only glitch was the goddamn thing was full of stickers of butterflies! I mean, WTF? These days I'm being accused of using a flowery pillow and a comforter, having pink lips and wearing flowery shirts and now this on top of all that! Of course the allegations are all false; when I was buying the pillow cover there were only flowery ones, the comforter was provided when I got the apartment, I DON'T use lipstick and the shirt is not really flowery. Certainly not pink. So, worry not fellas I'm not turning gay or anything, and I'm definitely NOT going to stick those goddamn stickers onto the computer!

How to Heal a Broken Heart

I'm a member of a very well known cricket forum in Sri Lanka, but we are not limited to talk just about cricket there. We have just about everything there, to be frank and a place to be. So, I was going through some old threads of it and came across this particular one where some guy had just experienced the pain of a broken heart and posted a thread asking for some advice on "how to heal a broken heart." Among many suggestions such as hanging our with friends, music, booze, quality porn and even Multi-Bond and duct tape, there was this piece which is simply gold, by someone (let's say B) and truly it was too good not to share. Perhaps it might even help a couple of you guys out there. Actually it's written for a guy, but it pretty much applies to a girl as well. So go ahead peeps, have a look and heal your broken hearts if you happen to be so.



Alright, I'll take this as it's your (ex)girlfriend that dumped you. Here's how you heal it;

If this is your first love, probably nothing was ever painful as this is. It's not just any girl, it's the first person that you fell in love with, you may have thought that you'd be together forever, the jokes you shared, wonderful memories, conversations are just hard to forget. Since now it's all gone, you think you will never be happy again, right?

First things to do,

1. CUT ALL COMMUNICATIONS WITH HER. This is the only way! I know I know, you will feel like losing your best friend and hurt a lot but trust me! It'll only get better.
   
   
2. You probably only remember the good times. But recall the bad times, what you hated about her, things that you two never agreed upon.
   
   
3. Just because this is over doesn't mean it's all over. Ask your friends about how they dealt with these things.
   
   
4. Get some family, friends involved. Go out and have fun, movies, music, booze, work out. Whatever that makes your mind off this. Keep yourself occupied.
   
   
5. Be honest about how you feel, and it's OK to feel good too, you don't have to be sad all the time - remember there are others who still care about you.
   
   
6. Don't ask anyone about the girl, if someone refer to her as your girlfriend make sure they know that she's your exgirlfriend. Don't ask your friends about her, cut all communications like I said.
   
   
7. It's OK to cry, even for a guy, and you'll feel much better after you do, just don't do it out in the public.
   
   
8. Use this as an opportunity to be someone that you've always wanted to be, do something that you've always wanted to do.
   
   
9. Make some changes, rearrange your room, get some fresh air, get a hair cut. Don't just sit all day long, get out and do something. and give yourself enough time. Don't expect this to get better overnight.
   
   
10. YOU WILL NOT DIE! Although it feels like you are going to do die! you will NOT!
    

Now,

What could be in her mind? It takes two people to be in a relationship and one person to break it off. Although you feel the way you feel, may be it is meant to be this way. See from my personal experience I can tell you this is a very unfortunate situation to be in. It's ideal for two people to love each other so much and be in a relationship that would last forever. But know what son? Life ain't ideal.

If you really loved someone, then you'd know (at least after a while) that it's OK if they don't love you back, I heard. True love gives and expects nothing in return. I know, what I say might mean nothing to you (at least I was like that), it's hard to digest the pain of rejection, hearing someone say "move on things will be fine" is just bullshit eh? I hated whenever someone told me to "move on". You start to think about all that you've done for her, all the good times... all that. You know why you are still hurting from this? Because you haven't accepted it yet. Letting go means you accept that it's over. That you've lost, sometimes it's OK to accept that you've lost like in this situation you are in now. It will be for your good at the end. Just stop wondering what went wrong and all that shit. You think a text or a phone call won't do any harm but when they don't reply back, you feel shit.

If you keep worrying about this girl then you will give no chance for anyone else. And you could miss out on that special person who will love you back with the same intensity. Only when you stop chasing this girl, will you let that special person (could be your true love) into you.

Take it a day at a time, accept yourself for who you are, and most importantly forgive yourself for things you've done wrong (if you have). There will always be happiness around the corner bud. I think someone said, "you never stop loving someone, you just learn to live without them" (or something like that). That's exactly what you should do.

Please please please Don't do what I have done. DO NOT GET OBSESSED. It's not love, it's completely delusional. I wouldn't even want my worse enemy to be in this situation, yes PL, it's you. (This PL was the worst enemy of B on that particular forum)

Delete her phone number off your cell phone, throw away all her pictures and the pictures you both were in (well at least hide them so you can't see them anymore). Delete her from your messenger. Remove her from Facebook.

If you want to talk to someone and you can't seem to find anyone to talk to, go to yahoo answers and ask a question about break up and tell em how you feel. You will be surprised by the number of answers you get.

Listen to some music. Some say, it's not good to listen to sad songs in this situation, but I say bullshit. Even emo would do, listen to a band called Amber Pacific. If you are into just rock then listen to Matchbox 20 even that would do. Lets see, if you are into Alternative, Indie, Punk, Punk/Rock, Emo, Ska Punk, Skate Punk, Hardcore Punk, Garage Punk, Glam Punk, Celtic Punk, or any other punk genre I'll give you some cool bands to listen to. LOL.

Good luck!

Being Happy, Weekend and Cricket

If being happy is a crime, I'll probably be considered a serial killer these days. Perhaps a child molester or a rapist. And for you bastards out there who might use these words against me, no I'm neither one of those, it's just an analogy. But yes, I'm insanely happy these days, and when you feel like that, time flies like a, well, very fast. It is universally accepted that time passes double the normal speed during weekends which you should know only too well, but I think that this weekend was even double that. Saturday came and went before you know it, just managed to rearrange the room and cook some food. How many of you guys feel that rearranging your room is necessary? For me, I get tired of the same room arrangement if I am to stuck with one for more than two three months. Hence the necessity for some change. It's boring to just stick to one, isn't it? And I mean mundane stuff like this, not partners, mind you. Better stick to one when it comes to partners folks; it's got something to do with not getting AIDS or something like that. Try different styles with the same partner instead of the same style with different partners, they say. Who came up with that anyway? Some creative dude, I'm sure.

Then, on Sunday we were scheduled to play a cricket match - if you are a regular reader here you should already know that I started playing some hard ball cricket, but if you're not one of that elite bunch, well now you do. And in case you're not one of them, you should try to be one - a candy bar will be sent to all the regulars at the end of the year. Don't ask me how you guys are supposed to divide it - I let you decide by yourselves. Anyway. We were scheduled to play a forty over match, but we being Sri Lankans and the opposition being Indians we duly got late in typical Asian manner and it was decided that we will play 32-overs-a-side match. How they decided it should exactly be 32 is beyond me, I'd have preferred a more round figure like 30. Still, luckily our stand in captain won the toss and we elected to bat first and I got to go in at two down for twenty something runs. And played a satisfactory knock, 32 runs to be exact. Almost everyone chipped in and we made 201 all out in the last over. And the Indians were routed for 97. Cool eh? Actually we had a new guy coming in our team, let's call him J, though vastly talented than most of us. A leftie, and he was so fierce when he steamed in all the Indians were practically more concerned on not getting hit rather than scoring runs. Luckily we don't have practice sessions - facing J in practices would be a nightmare. And after few overs, they had given up all hopes of winning the match and were playing so dull cricket we had to invent new ways of getting them out. Like bowling juicy full tosses and letting them hit. It worked in the end though.

And now here I am back at work on a Monday, feeling pretty terrible as it is customary on Mondays. They should ban Mondays or something. Seriously. After five alarms I barely managed to get myself up this morning and naturally got late thirty minutes or so. But looking at the hit counter this morning made me chuckle, as one dude (assuming it's a dude) had googled how to find porn on facebook links and another, this time probably a girl though again I'm not entirely sure, had googled something funny to say on facebook to get him interested and ended up here. Hope they found what they were looking for, though I'm pretty sure I haven't posted links to porn on this blog. Still, always happy to be of help, I am.

Happy week ahead fellas!

It's Been a Year Folks!

I was thinking of how to write this post for a week or so. Perhaps even more. After contemplating all the brilliant ideas my genius of a mind kept throwing at me, finally I've decided to actually not think but just write sparring you the would-have-been anniversary post of the year.

Yes folks, it's been a year already!

Exactly a year ago, I started with this lame and pretty much nothing post, and how cool is it that a year on and I'm still writing pretty much the same crap posts? It takes a special dude like me - the king of crap blogging - to do that. All hail me!

Seriously, when I started a year ago, I had absolutely NO idea what I was going to write about, or even that if I'll be able to keep writing for this long. Never did I think that I'd enjoy it so much or that I'd have this blog in my top-five-things-to-save-in-a-fire list though I don't think that a blog needs saving from a fire. You get the point though.

A big, huge, mega thank you of astronomical proportions to all you my fellow bloggers. You are awesomeness! If I stop being modest for a second, it feels so good to know that you guys - at least some of you - read what I write and even perhaps like it. That keeps me going. I made a lot of friends from the Lankanosphere that I haven't even met, but you have been simply great. Thanks a lot for everything guys, I owe you big time.

Also a big thanks to all the non-blogging friends who have been reading the crap I write. Most of them are my FB friends, people who know me in real life, and it's good to know that you guys drop by. Keep coming back fellas, you'll be able to say to your grandchildren I knew him, when I take over the blogging world one day and become THE blogger every one so envies. Well, not really, but still keep coming back guys - it's good to have you around.

And some special thanks to three special friends in my life. First, to Damith, who in a way got me into blogging (I doubt even the bugger himself knows it) and who introduced me to Kottu. Thanks dude, and I'm missing your not-as-good-as-mine but still good posts. Then, Loonie and Solomon. Thanks guys for your constant constructive criticism (that's kinda hard to pronounce is it not?) and encouragement. You kept me going, and if not for you perhaps I wouldn't have come this far. You rock!

Alright then, gotta run folks.
Cheers!