My Brain's Gone Crazy

When you have a particularly painful headache the first thought the brains throws at you is something like Dude, what the hell are you still doing at work? let's go hit the bed, but of course that's not an option. At least not when you have only two paid leaves left for the year and you happen to have plans for those two as well. Then the brain starts to get pissed off, probably because it thinks that it is superior than the body that it has chosen to reside in, but the problem is then it starts to throw really weird thoughts and ideas (though I'm not sure what's the difference between thoughts and ideas, it felt like two words instead of one there would fit better) at you just for the fun of it. It'll throw one at you, and just when you get over it, brain'll go like; Oh you liked that biatch, check this out then and will throw even crazier thought at you. It's endless. Perhaps it must be thinking you'd get fed up with all the weird thoughts and choose to go home early or something. Tough luck buddy, try next year when I have more leaves so that I can afford to take one.

However, now that my brain has decided to attack me with these thoughts right now, I've decided not to let it take control over me and let me take home, instead to fight them and stay here till six. And post those thoughts here so at a later stage when my brain decides to look at the blog it'll probably be embarrassed and will refrain from doing such things in the future. Hopefully.

OK. First one. What if we humans were a cold-blooded species, like many reptiles instead of being the warm-blooded creatures we are today. How different the world would be if it was the case? There would have been a lot more subways (not the restaurant chain though I wouldn't mind more Subways over MacDonald's), different sense of fashion altogether, no marathons or cricket - altogether a wholly different world. Add to that the possibility if we were cold-blooded that we might as well be egg-laying creatures. Now that's a thought. Imagine, after so many months of pregnancy the mother lays an egg (DO NOT LAUGH!) and then instead of the mother going to the clinic, the parents will probably bring the eggs. Imagine a long line of parents waiting outside the clinic with their newly-laid eggs. What a mess would it be if they happen to mix up their eggs? And either way, doctors will poke all kinds of medical stuff into those eggs, probably that scanning thing too and parents will be able to see the kid inside and even go like Ohh.... he's so cute!!!. And when the time comes, would we have opt to hatch them at home with all the relatives around, or would we still preferred hospitals? OK now I cannot keep a straight face anymore. That is a messed up world alright.

What if some crazy aliens decided that they should pay us a visit and just for the fun of it polluted our world with some kind of gas or something, so that the only way for us humans in that world to survive is to smoke cigarettes? Imagine that! All of a sudden all the drug preventing associations and such will run out of business, everyone who so opposed smoking will actually start it, even parents will encourage their children to smoke! Scary if not crazy, I know, but it's fun too eh?

Then my brain goes like, OK dude, how about stepping in a woman's shoes? though I seriously doubt I could fit my foot into a woman's shoe unless she's a particularly large creature, but you get the idea right. So, now I'm thinking of an utterly female-dominant society. While they go to work, earn money to feed the family and stuff, we stay at home, feed the kids, do the laundry and clean the house. Please you males out there, don't start to chase me brandishing whatever that's in your hand right now for a) I'm not really in a state to run right now, even for my life and b) It's not really me, my brain that's doing all this so pardon me. Anyway, then men will get all the roses, girls will start to dig men (not that they don't now) and we, men, will be the oppressed and discriminated bunch. Think of a world where men's rights associations rallying on the streets for their freedom, asking women to stop discriminating against men!

No. That's too much of a scary thought. Alright brain you win - I'm going home.